Padma Lakshmi: A Journey of Resilience and Empowerment

The name Padma Lakshmi is not unknown to many. The 53-year-old, who is of Indian-American heritage, began her career as a model, has done odd acting work, traveled the globe with the cooking program Top Chef, and is a best-selling book. Her most recent program, Taste the Nation, is being praised and appreciated for bringing America's immigrant narrative to the forefront via the lens of cuisine and more. She is also a humanitarian who works diligently for the cause of women's health.

Padma Lakshmi recently spoke at the ABP Network Ideas of India Summit 3.0 in Mumbai. She opened up about her early life, the father she never met, being a woman of color in America, and how she turned her obstacles into possibilities in a powerful and inspiring session led by journalist-author Vir Sanghvi. Excerpts.

Vir Sanghvi: Padma Lakshmi was born at Delhi's Safdarjung Hospital, despite the fact that we consider her to be a New Yorker.

Padma Lakshmi: My mother brought me there since my grandpa resided there. I grew up in Moti Bagh during my first four years of existence. I still like visiting Delhi. Its chaat is the finest. When I go to India, food is my first priority. I constantly make a mental inventory of everything I plan to consume.

You also often returned to Chennai, where you had another residence.

I was mostly raised in America. After a very tumultuous marriage to my father, my mother made the drastic choice to file for divorce in the early 1970s. I lived with my grandparents till I was four years old when she emigrated to America. Later on, my grandparents relocated to Chennai. They want to be nearer to their ancestors as we are Palghat Tam Brahms, or Tamil Brahmins. I grew up traveling back and forth between Chennai and New York. Every year for three months, Madras was where I would spend the most of my summers. I still have a strong sense of kinship with my relatives in India.

You had a difficult upbringing. There wasn't much money that your mother had. You endured hardship almost the whole time until, as your narrative states, you arrived in Italy. How did it come about?

I'm often asked, "How did you plan your life?"To be honest, I had no plans at all. I made the most of the possibilities that were presented to me. I tutor many young ladies in America, some of whom I have known for fifteen years. However, I never had a mentor and my career was not guided by any manual, so I wanted to make things simpler for them. "Push against the open door," is what I tell them every time. Even if the possibilities you are presented with may not align with your precise professional or life goals, you never know where they may lead. I've read that Steve Jobs, the creator of Apple, benefited from having taken a calligraphy course in college while creating the iPhone. My career is what I have because of all I have done throughout my life.

I had large debt repayments for my college education. Modeling wasn't this glamorous endeavor for me. Even though the modeling I was doing was quite menial, it was a means to a goal that enabled me to become independent and pay off my college debts.

If I hadn't had the chance to travel and experience the globe when I was younger, I don't believe I would be a writer and food blogger today. Coming from my socioeconomic situation, I could never have had that kind of education on its own. I always encourage young people who have a passion for food to pursue their dreams since it's what helped shape who I am today.

I was always hopping between American and Indian customs. I never felt like I was Indian enough in Madras, and I never felt like I was American enough in America because of the way I looked. It's much simpler in America these days, and I hope that my program Taste the Nation may add something positive to the dialogue by stating things like, "Hey, Indians, Chinese, or Mexicans... We are the reason America is great; regardless of your race, you have contributed to the prosperity and global domination of the American economy. We have immigrated to America, using the finest aspects of all our cultures to our job and daily existence.

I wanted to change the wording a little bit since I disagree with the common belief in America that White Republicans are the only ones who can be patriotic. I'm trying to be patriotic by recognizing everyone who has helped to make America a social and cultural powerhouse in addition to an economic one via Taste the Nation. Because of the music, movies, television shows, and other artistic mediums that have been influenced by the many immigrants and immigrant descendants who have made America their home, young people find it appealing.

Before there were many Indians in America, you were one of them. You have discussed experiencing racial abuse and being bullied at school. What was your reaction to that?

When I reflect on my life, I am grateful for those bullies—I'm not just saying this to seem moral; they served as excellent training grounds and contributed to the development of my thick skin. The first thing a woman needs is a thick skin, particularly if she's a dark lady working in entertainment! I was aware that there would be more obstacles in my way than in someone else's to get what I desired. I had to learn everything the hard way since I was ignorant of the industry.

My dad is a plumber, and my mother is a retired nurse, therefore I didn't come from wealth. Our way of life was really working-class. However, I do believe that every challenge I faced—whether it was my vehicle accident or even being publically chastised in the media—shaped who I am now. Without it, I don't believe I would be as powerful as I am now.

You admit in your book that you didn't think of yourself as gorgeous or even lovely when you first began.

The world continually tells 53-year-old women like myself that their time is running out. Time is not at all up, I am here to inform you! There was no one who resembled me while I was growing up. Based on how others responded to me, I thought I was pretty, but the models in commercials and on the catwalk seemed like a different species. I didn't start to think that modeling would be a good job until I moved to Italy and started doing modeling.

Being from a very traditional South Indian family and being very much my grandfather's kid, I had conflicting emotions about modeling. It was not my plan for myself, and I was worried about how they would feel. Although I was majoring in theater and literature, I was forced to accept the finest chance that presented itself—modeling. To be honest, I felt very grateful for it.

What effect did the accident have on your confidence, considering that you now have a lifelong scar on your right arm?

When I was fourteen, I was in an automobile accident that almost cost me my right arm. It broke into a million fragments. Thank God for my mother and for persevering, as the second surgeon who examined me remarked, "Well, she is so young, let's try to save the arm." He was successful in saving my arm. Since there was no retouching when I began modeling in the early 1990s, I never imagined that I could be a model. I became very skilled at hiding it with makeup and arranging my body so that the scar would not show. However, it did seriously hinder my modeling career. I did it for the money, and I intended to continue doing it until I got a job in television and movies. I didn't think it was much of a job; I didn't have much confidence.

Then you were photographed by one of the best photographers in the world, Helmut Newton. He thought you were beautiful and he admired the scar. Tell us the tale.

I was approached by a German photographer named Helmut Newton, who insisted on having me shoot with him. He was such a famous name that my agency was thrilled about him. When I realized I would have to take nude photos, I canceled the assignment because I was anxious. It was unlike anything I had ever done. "Look, I'm not comfortable," I murmured. The legendary Helmut Newton was turned down by me. However, he phoned back six weeks later and said, "It is not going to be nude." What happens if we position you when it's just topless? I answered, "Okay," since I wanted to see your scar. Although the ambiance in the room was not at all sexual, I was nonetheless frightened. It seemed like if I was with my grandpa. It was not at all what I had anticipated, and he was quite sweet.

After the photos were out, in less than three months, every designer who had before told me I couldn't walk on their catwalks or could only wear long sleeves made sure I had short sleeves to highlight the scar, which was now prominent because to Helmut Newton's coolness.

One thing I've learned is how arbitrary beauty standards are. I was so underweight while I was growing up in India that everyone in my family tried to feed me. However, the ideals of beauty were very different when I lived in America. Every child of immigrants goes through this; there is a lot of code-switching. However, none of us are the same person every single day. That taught me how to be a bit of a chameleon and how to act appropriately in any circumstance.

Ultimately, my success sprang from all the things in my life that I first saw as barriers or characteristics that made me stand out from the competition. I had good fortune.

Not only for dark women, but for women worldwide, particularly in America, you serve as an inspiration. You have a great sense of style, are well-spoken, and exude confidence, but based on your narrative, you weren't always like that in your early years.

I had many reasons to be uneasy in the world, thus I wasn't particularly confident. The only thing that comes to mind while I'm shaking inside is how much my mother went through and how many sacrifices she had to make. In the 1970s, what she did was very forbidden. She gave us a fresh start in life, and I want to repay her by making her proud. Even my grandpa, who was rather conservative, seems to agree, I believe.

I am not beyond asking those I respect for their approval. Ultimately, however, you come to the realization that you must create your own morality and ethics. People have sometimes given me advice on how to go differently. But I had to get used to hearing that voice inside of me. I often repeat it to my daughter, Krishna. Simply ask yourself, "What do you want?" while you are in a private area, even if it is a hotel toilet stall.And whether the question is "yes" or "no," I can assure you that your body, whether it be your heart, head, or your gut, will tell you what the correct response is. I've only made mistakes when I haven't paid attention to that voice. That voice has strength. That voice becomes stronger the more you utilize it. It's not like I feel very confident right now. I still have extreme insecurity in certain circumstances.

I would have given anything to have occurred to me when I was 25 or 30 years old, but in the last few years, I feel like I can appreciate and put certain things in perspective. Whether my TV series are huge hits or none at all, I will always be the same me. That requires a lot of introspection. It requires emotionally falling over a cliff and telling oneself that everything will be well. Life is not short. You must act in your own judgment.

You have experienced suffering, bereavement, and death in your own life. Even so, you seem stronger today.

I had an extremely unusual condition that sent me to the hospital two days before to my 14-year-old vehicle accident. On Friday, I left the hospital, and on Sunday, I returned there immediately. Although our home was 50 miles distant from the nearest temple, my mother was a devout Catholic. We had a vehicle accident on the way back after performing an archana, and I spent months in the hospital.

It was challenging for me to break up with someone in public as well. We never had a connection. My father was born. Whenever I visited eateries or canteens in India, I used to worry whether somebody there was my father. I have no photos of him at all. I was just two when my parents got divorced, and they destroyed all the photos. In return for a divorce, he forced my mother to sign an affidavit promising never to beg for assistance from him and granting her permission to remove me from India.

Consequently, my father's rejection of me left me feeling inadequate from an early age. Whatever transpired during their marriage remained private between them. But I would continually wonder myself, why didn't he desire me? It was a very challenging experience to go through.

Every time I see the doctor, I am reminded of the fact that I am ignorant of the medical background of half of my family. I'm not a fan of Father's Day. I just received a call letting me know that my biological father passed away, exactly one year ago. It was just a month ago that I became aware of this. I started crying as soon as I hung up the phone. I asked myself, "Why am I crying?" How am I supposed to miss something I never knew?However, I believe that the reason I am in grief is because, as an adult, all of those unfulfilled childhood emotions have resurfaced. It's like bleeding without a wound when you grieve without a memory. You're not sure from whence it is coming.

Ultimately, however, I must also give my father credit. The fact that he rejected me increased my ambition and desire to succeed. Without our trip to America, I would not have developed into the person I am now. That would have been the extent of my mother's upper-middle-class marriage. Thus, even the most trying experiences I have had have been beneficial in some manner. My sense of humor has also helped to keep me from falling into the abyss. This is not a depressing conversation, and I don't want it to become that. It's a joyful conversation.

You have seen firsthand how difficult it may be for women to get correct diagnosis, which contributes to many health problems. They avoid discussing it. They endure pain. They are virtually led to feel that it is their responsibility to endure hardships as women. Tell us about the situation.

Endometriosis affected me. It's a really severe illness that affects the reproductive system in women. Asians seem to be more prone to it, according to preliminary studies. But there isn't enough money to support that. I was in excruciating agony. During my period, I spent one week a month in bed. Although I tend to be rather talkative, I really didn't want to go on stage and start talking about my vagina. It is very unattractive. However, I believed it was significant because, after receiving the necessary therapy, I became aware of what life was like for women worldwide.

Together with my physician, I established a foundation in 2009 to promote awareness and funds for research on this topic. Through our program, 35,000 youths in the tri-state region of New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut have learned about the condition up to this point. Additionally, we altered the legislation in the state of New York so that each time sex education is offered, students should also learn about fibroids and PCOS, two major conditions that affect women's reproductive systems.

Because we want to educate guys as well, we are adamant about attending the science class. When a boy gets it, he'll become a better spouse, parent, and brother. We have been able to support research at several hospitals and colleges in addition to doubling the amount of money the federal government provides for this sickness. We have also succeeded in altering the way this sickness is taught in medical colleges. Together with Harvard Medical School, we established the nation's first center for gynecologic pathology research at MIT. I'm glad to announce that it will most likely be what people remember me for.

It grieved me to be informed I would never have children around the time I got divorced (from novelist Salman Rushdie). I knew I wanted to be a mother when I was 36 years old and unmarried. It was also this indignation that inspired me to launch the foundation. These days, I am approached by ladies who say, "Thank you for helping me." I gave my doctor this video after he refused to listen. It has been the honor of my life to be able to influence people's lives, therefore I advised him to visit your website. How many individuals have the chance to really accomplish that?

In the near term, Top Chef is what people remember you for the most. To the best of my knowledge, you were the first well-known Indian in the West to appear on a cooking program just for being herself, rather than because you were going to be preparing dosa or chola bhatura.

It was enjoyable to me. I got to know cooks from all across the globe because of it. The most popular cooking program in the world, Top Chef is shown in 175 countries. It is referred to be the "gold standard" in the business. I have no desire to become a chef and I am not one. I write about food. People were thus a bit skeptical when I initially started the job. Things like "How much does this former model know about food?"I experienced impostor syndrome as well. However, the only thing I know to do when I feel uneasy is to focus my attention on studying, research, or any other task that keeps my mind occupied.

For twenty seasons, Padma Lakshmi was a member of Top Chef.
For twenty seasons, Padma Lakshmi was a member of Top Chef.
I accomplished so, and over the years, I was able to gain the respect of my coworkers by demonstrating my sheer willpower and determination, leading many to remark, "She does know about food." All of the ladies in my family were excellent chefs. It was from them that I learnt about Indian cuisine and spices. And then I learned about European culinary methods when working as a model in France and Italy throughout my 20s. Those items are all valuable. I had no clue Top Chef would become a cultural phenomenon when I first began. I did it in the hopes that it might help my cookbook a bit, and it did just that.

You successfully convey the variety of America in Taste the Nation. You have traveled and discovered aspects of American cuisine that I never would have thought possible. Why did you act in that way?

It was, I believe, my professional experience in 2016 during the US presidential election. I began serving as an employee of the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU). I was really troubled by the hate speech emanating from (Donald) Trump's entourage. things like criminalizing Muslims and immigrants and enforcing prohibitions against them. In actuality, immigrants commit the fewest crimes in the United States. They are the ones who pay the highest taxes.

I think everyone in America has a fascinating story to share, and this country is full with fascinating people. All you need to do is open to hearing. While being on Top Chef is a huge achievement, that show wasn't made by me. I am the only creator of Taste the Nation. People are unaware that I spend 75% of my time behind the scenes on Taste the Nation. I am the boss of a large group of manufacturers. I write the program and do the research.

As soon as you begin working on your stuff, you should never work on someone else's project. Not that I won't, mind you. I still need money to pay for my expenses since I have a large property and office to maintain. So whatever it takes, I'll do it. However, it's been fantastic because I've had Black people approach me and say they were unaware of the Gullah Geechee culture, and other people have spoken about how Taste the Nation helped them learn about the Thai community in Las Vegas.

The most compelling narratives are those that pique Americans' curiosity in their neighbors and reduce their fear of strangers with strange names or foods. We are all ultimately interested in the same thing. We want to care for our children. We want a lovely home in order to feel protected, cared for, and able to grow. As we age, we want to be there to care for our elders. These ideals are neither American nor Indian. They are just principles. I like to believe that there are more things that unite us than divide us.

Thus, after seven years of work with the ACLU and interviews with a variety of immigrants, I received a comprehensive legal education from one of the nation's preeminent immigration law specialists and moved to the Southern States. I traveled down to Brownsville, Texas, which is the border with Hawaii. I experienced what it's like to go through the asylum procedure by taking foot tours of Matamoros and Reynosa, two of the riskiest border crossings.

Taste the Nation is directly influenced by and a byproduct of my work advocating for civil rights. This is a more tactful approach than jumping on my soapbox and giving folks lectures. Although none of them wants to discuss politics or religion, they will all tell you about the cookie recipe their grandma used to make. It works well as a Trojan horse to encourage communication. I am really grateful to each and every one of our participants who shares their life, opens their homes, and opens up about some truly difficult topics on our program. I get letters from a lot of instructors telling me that Taste the Nation is the best resource they have found for teaching about America in social studies or history classes.

Except for the headline, this story has not been edited by Press Time staff and has been published from a syndicated feed.